solace462

I have come curiously close to the end, down
Beneath my self-indulgent pitiful hole,
Defeated, I concede and
Move closer
I may find comfort here
I may find peace within the emptiness
How pitiful

It's calling me...

And in my darkest moment, fetal and weeping
The moon tells me a secret - my confidant
As full and bright as I am
This light is not my own and
A million light reflections pass over me

Its source is bright and endless
She resuscitates the hopeless
Without her, we are lifeless satellites drifting

And as I pull my head out I am without one doubt
Don't wanna be down here feeding my narcissism.
I must crucify the ego before it's far too late
I pray the light lifts me out
Before I pine away.

So crucify the ego, before it's far too late
To leave behind this place so negative and blind and cynical,
And you will come to find that we are all one mind
Capable of all that's imagined and all conceivable.
Just let the light touch you
And let the words spill through
And let them pass right through
Bringing out our hope and reason ...
before we pine away.

A groan of tedium escapes me,
Startling the fearful.
Is this a test? It has to be,
Otherwise I can't go on.
Draining patience, drain vitality.
This paranoid, paralyzed vampire act's a little old.

But I'm still right here
Giving blood, keeping faith
And I'm still right here.

Wait it out,
Gonna wait it out,
Be patient (wait it out).

If there were no rewards to reap,
No loving embrace to see me through
This tedious path I've chosen here,
I certainly would've walked away by now.
Gonna wait it out.

If there were no desire to heal
The damaged and broken met along
This tedious path I've chosen here
I certainly would've walked away by now.

And I still may ... (sigh) ... I still may.

Be patient.
I must keep reminding myself of this.

And if there were no rewards to reap,
No loving embrace to see me through
This tedious path I've chosen here,
I certainly would've walked away by now.
And I still may.

Gonna wait it out.

What's coming through is alive.
What's holding up is a mirror.
But what's singing songs is a snake
Looking to turn this piss to wine.

They're both totally void of hate,
But killing me just the same.

The snake behind me hisses
What my damage could have been.
My blood before me begs me
Open up my heart again.

And I feel this coming over like a storm again.
Considerately.

Venomous voice, tempts me,
Drains me, bleeds me,
Leaves me cracked and empty.
Drags me down like some sweet gravity.

The snake behind me hisses
What my damage could have been.
My blood before me begs me
Open up my heart again.

And I feel this coming over like a storm again.

I am too connected to you to
Slip away, to fade away.
Days away I still feel you
Touching me, changing me,
And considerately killing me.

Without the skin,
Beneath the storm,
Under these tears
The walls came down.

And the snake is drowned and
As I look in his eyes,
My fear begins to fade
Recalling all of those times.

I could have cried then.
I should have cried then.

And as the walls come down and
As I look in your eyes
My fear begins to fade
Recalling all of the times
I have died
and will die.
It's all right.
I don't mind.

I am too connected to you to
Slip away, to fade away.
Days away I still feel you
Touching me, changing me,

And considerately killing me.

how long can you make me wait here?
god knows you wanna dip right into this
it's getting late here
and I'm tired, so tired
of needing this fix

time
waiting for you
is it my secret
one i should never tell
I'll never tell

time
waiting for you
is it my secret
one i should never tell
I'll never tell

you think that i must be shaking
anticipation always gets me sick
my body aching
my fire, so tired
of this meaningless

time
waiting for you
is it my secret
one i should never tell
I'll never tell

time
waiting for you
is it my secret
one i should never tell
I'll never tell

time
waiting for you
is it my secret
one i should never tell
I'll never tell

time
how long can you make me wait here?

i think I'm breaking
and i can feel my cells begin to split
yeah I'm vibrating
up higher and higher
than i should have been

time
waiting for you
is it my secret
one i should never tell
I'll never tell

time
waiting for you
is it my secret
one i should never tell
I'll never tell

time
waiting for you
is it my secret
one i should never tell
I'll never tell

time
waiting for you
waiting for you
waiting for you

I'd listen to the words he'd say
But in his voice I heard decay
The plastic face forced to portray
All the insides left cold and gray
There is a place that still remains
It eats the fear it eats the pain
The sweetest price hell have to pay
The day the whole world went away

All I do
I can still feel you

Numb all through
I can still feel you
Hear your call
Underneath it all
Kill my brain
Yet you still remain
Crucified
After all Ive died
After all Ive tried
You are still inside

All I do
I can still feel you

You remain
I am stained

Lie in comfort of sweet calamity with nothing left to lose.
Lie in the darkness, I'm slowly drowned to sleep with nothing left to lose.
Three tears I've saved for you.

I'd retrace the steps that lead me here but nothing lives behind me.
So I lie in this field bathed in the light that loves me, with nothing left to lose.
Three tears I've saved for you.

Will you be my, be my beloved?
Will you help, help me to get through?
Will you be my, be my destruction?
Will you help, help me to be through?

Will you be my, be my beloved?
Will you help, help me to get through?
Will you be my, be my destruction?
Will you help? Three tears I've saved for you

No haven now as I watch it pour from everywhere.
Just like the storm that has come out of thin air.
Gentle caresses, just as paper thin -
frail and only- lack the strength to hold.

What if I could go to sleep for days,
would you count the hours,
or would your restlessness consume fading memories of me?

Fall into open arms that offer their protection.
Quick to deny that their open to deceit.
Long to believe that support will never cease.
Bitter and lonely, those they've left before.

What if I could go to sleep for days,
would you count the hours,
or would your restlessness consume fading memories of me?

The vibrant heart so quickly growing old,
the warmest eyes so quickly growing cold.
Just a glance for they don't care to see what becomes of me.

The vibrant heart so quickly growing old,
the warmest eyes so quickly growing cold.
Just a glance for they don't care to see what becomes of me.
What becomes of me.
What becomes of me.

What if I could go to sleep for days,
would you count the hours,
or would your restlessness consume

What if I could go to sleep for days,
would you count the hours,
or would your restlessness consume fading memories of me?

Hung in your room, swaying, hoping only that you'll see.
All by myself, I'm alone in such poor company.
The deeper I think, the deeper I seem to sink,
I can't stop the insects that are feeding,
pull the needles from beneath my skin.
I broke myself, shattered, tied a bow around every piece.
You'll love the eyes.
Have they always shown so vacantly?
The more I show the less you'll want to know.
I can't stop the insects that are feeding,
pull the needles from beneath my skin.

Now I'm on display.
I am becoming.
Hurt myself today.
It's all for you.
Do you like, do you like,
what I'm becoming?
Cut myself today.
It's all for you.

I part the night, flashing, approaching as I watch you flee.
Pushed through your panes.
Seems I've landed quite uncomfortably.
But as I pass through souls of broken glass
I can't stop the insects that are feeding.
Pull the needles from beneath my skin.

Now I'm on display.
I am becoming.
Hurt myself today.
It's all for you.
Do you like, do you like,
what I'm becoming?
Cut myself today.
It's all for you.

Please don't ask me just what I think, trust me,
you don't want to know.
Please don't ask me to open up, trust me, trust me,
'cause I can't
Stop the insects that are feeding.
Pull the needles from beneath my skin.

Now I'm on display.
I am becoming.
Hurt myself today.
It's all for you.
Do you like, do you like,
what I'm becoming?
Cut myself today.
It's all for you.

It's all for you.

Oh my God! My God this can't be happening!
God tell me, tell me this isn't real!
I can't believe all that I have foreseen is finally happening.
I cannot for a single second stand the way I feel.

I always knew. I always saw it coming.
Enveloped now, encased by my worst fear.
I've never felt the nausea of longing to feel nothing,
I never wanted to cease to exist, just disappear.

Fear memories are all that lie ahead. (Memories dull my senses)
Never have I felt so lost.
Fear tragedy is all that lies ahead. (Memories dull my senses)
Never have I felt so dead.

Once felt so warm, now I'm fucking freezing.
I am the once embraced abandoned one.
I raised my eyes up to the light in hopes of finding healing;
no relief was mine, I was burnt, by the sun.

Fear memories are all that lie ahead. (Memories dull my senses)
Never have I felt so lost.
Fear tragedy is all that lies ahead. (Memories dull my senses)
Never have I felt so dead.

I feel so
I feel so lost
I feel so lost
I feel so lost

Fear memories are all that lie ahead. (Memories dull my senses)
Never have I felt so lost.
Fear tragedy is all that lies ahead. (Memories dull my senses)
Never have I felt so dead.

Fear memories are all that lie ahead. (Memories dull my senses)
Never have I felt so lost.
Fear tragedy is all that lies ahead. (Memories dull my senses)
Never have I felt so dead.

how many times have i noticed that our eyes hardely ever meet
from your judgment seat i can feel the anger for my very being
fill me in on when you became such a big part of my life
that i should bother with all your lies designed to bring me down
wrong again don't depend on any reaction again
i remember the icy walls that shot up from no where
and i can see every lie that you ever told yourself
you bleed me dry and i don't ask why but i'm left with the dust
judas kiss i dismiss thank you all for this i am unjudged i am
wait again i'm not through with the screaming
i contend that you've got nothing better to do
trade my life for a barrel of gold find someone else before i get too old
if i live my life for aesthetic gain will you repay me with all your shame
i can see every light inside your brain
go on every time that i walk by for noise and whispers
your comfort in my suffering is no longer disturbing
i'm lost beyond your petty stopwatch in life's real time lifes real
wait again im not through with the screaming
and i contend that you've got nothing better to do
trade my life for a barrel of gold find someone else before i get to old
if i live my life for aesthetic gain will you repay me with all your shame
don't get up i was slowly leaving the room when the door of your judgment swings back around again
maybe i'll stop to watch your act and i'll go on my way
i've seen quite enough of too many childish games
i'm ashamed of every moment that i ever gave them the time of day
all the worst of enemies are somehow always friends that used to be

i want to find the water
that will wash this whole damned slate clean
break down
break up
we sleep in what we create
right now i'm living so much hate
right here my sin's have all been paid to you your friends
and for your sake
i feel dirty and so depraved
my knees have bled to hold you here but now i've lost the taste
for lies force fed as time well spent
and if another angel says just grin and bear it
i might be forced to smash his head against the wall and never sin again against myself or trust in anyone
write me off for suffering it's a joke
i give up

If I hadn't made me
I would've been made somehow
If I hadn't assembled myself
I'd have fallen apart by now

If I hadn't made me
I'd be more inclined to bow
Powers that would have swallowed me up,
but thats more than I can allow
If you let them make you,
they'll make you paper-mache

At a distance your strong
until the wind comes,
then you crumble and blow away.
If you let them fuck you,
there will be no foreplay.

But rest assured
they'll screw you complete
'til your ass is blue and grey.


You should make amends with you.
If only for better health.
But if you really want to live,
why not try and Make Yourself?

If I hadn't made me
I'd have fallen apart by now
I wont let em' make me,
it's more than I can allow.

So when I make me
I wont be paper-mache.
And if I fuck me....
I'll fuck me in my own way.

You should make amends with you
If only for better health.
But if you really want to live,
why not try and Make Yourself?
Make Yourself.

i still recall the taste of your tears
echoing your voice just like the ringing in my ears
my favorite dreams of you still wash ashore
scraping through my head 'till i don't want to sleep anymore

you make this all go away
you make this all go away
i'm down to just one thing
and i'm starting to scare myself
you make this all go away
you make this all go away
i just want something
i just want something i can never have

you always were the one to show me how
back then i couldn't do the things that i can do now
this thing is slowly taking me apart
grey would be the color if i had a heart
come on tell me

you make this all go away
you make this all go away
i'm down to just one thing
and i'm starting to scare myself
you make this all go away
you make this all go away
i just want something
i just want something i can never have

in this place it seems like such a shame
though it all looks different now,
i know it's still the same
everywhere i look you're all i see
just a fading fucking reminder of who i used to be
come on tell me

you make this all go away
you make this all go away
i'm down to just one thing
and i'm starting to scare myself
you make this all go away
you make it all go away
i just want something
i just want something i can never have
i just want something i can never have

This is what I brought you this you can keep,
This is what I brought you may forget me.
I promise to depart just promise one thing,
Kiss my eyes and lay me to sleep.

This is what I brought you this you can keep,
This is what I brought you may forget me.
I promise you my heart just promise to sing,
Kiss my eyes and lay me to sleep.

Kiss my eyes and lay me to sleep.

This is what I thought,
I thought you need me,
This is what I thought so think me naive,
I promise you a heart you'd promise to keep,
Kiss my eyes and lay me to sleep.

Kiss my eyes and lay me to sleep.

Kiss my eyes and lay me to sleep.

I cannot leave here, I cannot stay,
Forever haunted, more than afraid.
Asphyxiate on words I would say,
I'm drawn to a blackened sky as I turn blue.

There are no flowers, no not this time,
There'll be no angels gracing the lines,
Just these stark words, I find.
I'd show a smile, but i'm too weak,
I'd share with you could I only speak,
Just how much this, hurts me.

I cannot stay here, I cannot leave,
Just like all I loved, I make believe.
Imagine heart, I disappear, seems,
No one will appear, here and make me real.

There are no flowers, no not this time,
There'll be no angels gracing the lines,
Just these stark words, I find.
I'd show a smile, but i'm too weak,
I'd share with you could I only speak,
Just how much this, hurts me.

I'd tell you how it haunts me,
I'd tell you how it haunts me,
(cuts through my day, and sinks into my dreams.)
I'd tell you how it haunts me,
(cuts through my day, and sinks into my dreams.)
You don't care that it haunts me.

Oh,
There are no flowers, no not this time,
There'll be no angels gracing the lines,
Just these stark words, I find.
I'd show a smile, but i'm too weak,
I'd share with you could I only speak,
Just how much this, hurts me.

Just how much this, hurts me.

Just how much you...

Walked away, heard them say
"Poison hearts will never change, walk away again"
Turned away in disgrace
Felt the chill upon my face cooling from within

It's hard to notice gleaming from the sky
When you're staring at the cracks
It's hard to notice what is passing by with eyes lowered

You... walked away, heard them say
"Poisoned hearts will never change, walk away again"

All the cracks, they lead right to me
And all the cracks will crawl right through me
All the cracks, they lead right to me
And all the cracks will crawl right through me, and I fell apart

As I... walked away, heard them say
"Poisoned hearts will never change"
Walked away again
Turned away in disgrace
Felt the chill upon my face cooling from within

Don't waste your touch, you won't feel anything
Or were you sent to save me?
I've thought too much, you won't find anything...
Worthy of redeeming

Yo he estado aqui muchas veces antes y regreso

To... break down, and cease all feeling
Burn now, what once was breathing
Reach out, and you may take my heart away

Imperfect cry, and scream in ecstasy
So what befalls the flawless?
Look what I've built, it shines so beautifully
Now watch as it destroys me

Y regreso aqui otra vez y comienzo

To... break down, and cease all feeling
Burn now, what once was breathing
Reach out, and you may take my heart away

Break down, and cease all feeling
Burn now, what once was breathing
Reach out, and you may take my heart away

I left it all behind, and never said goodbye
I left it all behind, and never said goodbye
I left it all behind, and never said goodbye
I left it all to die

I saw its birth, I watched it grow
I felt it change me
I took the life, I ate it slow
Now it consumes me

I... break down, and cease all feeling
Burn now, what once was breathing
Reach out, and you may take my heart away

Break down, and cease all feeling
Burn now, what once was breathing
Reach out, and you may take my heart away
... Heart away

Thank You for making me
feel like I'm guilty
Making it easy to murder your sweet memory

You were way out of line,
went and turned it all around on me again
How can I not smell your lie
Through the smoke and arrogance.

But now I know
So you will not get away with it again
I'm distant in those hollow eyes
For I have reached my end. So...

Thank You for making me
feel like I'm guilty
Making it easy to murder your sweet memory

Before I go tell me
Were you ever who you claimed yourself to be

Either way i must say goodbye.
You're dead to me. So I...

Thank You for making me
feel like I'm guilty
Making it easy to murder your sweet memory

I'm severing the heart then I'm leaving your corpse behind
Not dead but soon to be, though.
I won't be the one who killed you
I'll just leave that up to you

I'm not gonna be here to revive you
I'm not gonna be here to revive you
I'm not gonna be here to revive you
I'm gonna be the one to say...

I told you so (X8)
I told you

Severing the heart then I'm leaving you corpse behind
Not dead but soon to be and
I'm gonna be the one to say I told you so

Lost again
Broken and weary
Unable to find my way
Tail in hand
Dizzy and clearly unable to
Just let this go

I am surrendering to the gravity and the unknown
Catch me heal me lift me back up to the sun
I choose to live

I fell again
Like a baby unable to stand on my own
Tail in hand
Dizzy and clearly unable to just let this go
High and surrendering to the gravity and the unknown
Catch me heal me lift me back up to the sun
I choose to live, I choose to live, I choose to live

Catch me heal me lift me back up to the sun
Help me survive the bottom

Calm these hands before they
Snare another pill and
Drive another nail down another
Needy hole please release me

I am surrendering to the gravity and the unknown
Catch me heal me lift me back up to the sun
I choose to live, I choose to live